What you focus on expands. We all see what we believe to be true. We love to be right (and who doesn't more than our ego?) and so we look for evidence, usually completely subconsciously, to prove to ourselves right. If I believe my body is disgusting, all day I notice every little bulge and blemish, I feel worried or guilty about almost everything I eat, and I compare and judge myself against every woman I see.
Be honest: How much of your inner dialogue, time and energy get wasted on beating yourself up? How much of your life, your opportunities and your potential are you missing out on because you're feeling bad about yourself? I talk with a LOT of women and this is something almost all of them say they're sick of wasting their energy on.
What would it be like to stop battling your body and to partner with it instead? If letting yourself love your body is too big a step (and PLEASE don't feel bad - we've all got a lifetime of cultural programming to undo), can you at least agree to take a deep breath and start seeing it more like a friend? Here are four ways to show your body you're on its side:
- Dress your body. Figure out what time of day you feel your best (when you get home in the evening, right before bed?) and lay out your outfit, including jewelry and shoes, for the next day. This says to your body: "You are worth the time and forethought."
- Adorn your body. Wear a little something extra: A scent (try Ylang Ylang or Jasmine essential oils for their sensualizing qualities), a fancy necklace, your grandma's ring, a luxurious scarf, some bright lipstick or eye makeup, sparkly glitter, or flowers in your hair! This says to your body: "You deserve the extra bling."
- Decorate your body. Give yourself a manicure. Get yourself a henna tattoo (try tibetan shops for tubes to DIY or do it with friends). This says to your body: "You are a piece of art."
- Moisturize your body. Every day I smooth my whole body with sweet almond or coconut oil (get at your grocery store). This says to your body: "I care how you feel."